Meet Lyla. The youngest member of our extended family (my great niece).
The Early Years
Theresa, Cecilia, Maria, Joe
We begin to learn long before we are born. I may have sensed this intuitively before I entered Graduate School, but I now know it to be true – especially when it comes to educating the heart. If I am going to be an effective educator and knowledge translator in the area of social and emotional learning, I have to begin by understanding how my own heart was educated. I say this because I believe that the effectiveness of educators depends more on who you are than what you do. Who am I? I grew up in a small smelter town, Trail, British Columbia. My father was a Italian, my mother Scottish. I am the middle of 5 children. Being surrounded by a loving, loud, sometimes overbearing Italian family was one of my greatest assets. Having two older sisters to look up to, and a little brother and sister to care for built a strong foundation in teamwork, collaboration, and compromise.
Andrea, Maria, Joe
But, as is the case with every family, mine also taught me how to deal with adversity. From the time I was young my mother suffered from clinical depression. At that time in history there was so little known about mental illness, and my mom did not have the good fortune of receiving the kinds of gold standard treatments that exist today. For her, my dad, and all of us children there were times of great suffering. Ever the optimist, I also look back on this experience as having provided me with opportunity. My parents were open about my mom's depression. They did not shroud it in darkness and stigma. It was spoken about as though it were an illness, just like diabetes or cancer. I know that I came away from this early experience with a great deal of resilience (the ability to thrive in the face of adversity). And it set me on a livelong mission to help parents who love their children, but who often need support to overcome barriers, and to create a home that will allow their children to be confident, competent and
loving human beings.
loving human beings.
Creating a Family
If my heart started it's 'education' when I was a child, it did it's PhD in my years as a parent! What a responsibility it is to bring new people into the world. Today our children are young adults who are making their own way in the world. They have loving relationships, and know how to have fun. They are kind. That is a wonderful thing to see. But they also experience challenges. And, what I have come to appreciate is that our job as parents was not to shield them from difficulties, but to give them the tools and confidence they need to navigate adversity. Because 'stuff happens'.
While in graduate school one of the questions I continually asked myself (and anyone else who would listen!) was how the research on child development, and especially social and emotional development, could be translated so that it was useful for parents. All parent want their children to be happy. Social and emotional competencies such as awareness of your own emotions, awareness of others' emotions , and the ability to get along with others are essential to being a happy person. Developing those skills needs to be on our agenda as much as teaching the ABC's.